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Englisch Jokes Anyone?

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alt Re: Jokes Anyone?

PixelHunter
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GINO hat geschrieben
(*Phone Opened*)
LazyGirl:hello
Microsoft:welcome to the microsoft campany may i help you
LazyGirl:yes
Microsoft:what help you need
LazyGirl:can you scrach my back im lazy to scratch it
Microsoft:i can't you sh*t,b*tch,f*ck you
(phone closed)


when i read this, i almost killed myself...

alt Computer Problems

GINO
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want some more jokes

Computer Problems
apple corporation:
guy:can you return my files i acedentaly deleted it
apple corporation:its just in recycle bin
guy:whats recycle bin
apple corporation:u dont know
guy:yes,i think if change my time to time were my files deleted its will be back
apple corporation:your such a imaginator
guy:whats imaginator
apple corporation:you sh*t
guy:ah sh*t
apple corporation: i dont say imaginator means sh*t
guy:ok lets go to topic recycle bin
apple corporation:ok
apple corporation:recycle bin is a program that capture files if you delete a file it goes to recycle bin
guy:where is recycle bin
apple corporation:on your desktop
guy:i see it now,wow its amazing how you see my desktop from there
apple corporation:you sh*t,b*tch and f*ck dont call again forever and ever again
(phone closed)

about trash can
no_brain_girl:what is trash can
unknown_genius_boy:you dont know trash can no_brain_girl:yes
unknown_genius_boy:so,trash can is were you throw a trash
no_brain_girl:ah,and what is trash
unknown_genius_boy:ask encarta 1010 not me you sh*t and dont ask me again forever
no_brain_girl:ok???
(the end)
8× editiert, zuletzt 08.02.10 12:43:15

alt Re: Jokes Anyone?

Mawd
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bill: francis, u look like shit
francis: but i bath everyday
boomer: brom.brom...uuuuuuureee!
francis: see?
bill: O _ O...

another joke

*class studying computer*
*a student doenst know howto control the computer*

student: teacher, i got problem over here.
teacher: ill call 911

alt Re: Jokes Anyone?

PixelHunter
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GINO hat geschrieben
want some more jokes
Spoiler >


PlayerNoob hat geschrieben
This is not supposed to be funny! DO NOT LAUGH!

...


Im really going to kill myself!

alt laggers dont speedhack

GINO
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guy: hey your speed hacking
server: sorry im lag
guy:no your speedhacking
server: now im not lag
guy:why your fast
server:i see your speedhacking plz dont look your self
guy:wtf,im speedhacking i see
server: lol,stop cheating
guy:how to stop this
server:wtf,just run fast
guy has left the game(speedhack detected)
machine:the guy seems to be speedhacking(kicked)
server:huhuhuhu speedhacker
(the end)

alt Re: Jokes Anyone?

lenz-_-
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GINO hat geschrieben
guy: hey your speed hacking
server: sorry im lag
guy:no your speedhacking
server: now im not lag
guy:why your fast
server:i see your speedhacking plz dont look your self
guy:wtf,im speedhacking i see
server: lol,stop cheating
guy:how to stop this
server:wtf,just run fast
guy has left the game(speedhack detected)
machine:the guy seems to be speedhacking(kicked)
server:huhuhuhu speedhacker
(the end)


o.0

Here is one joke that i heard today..

Whoever works makes mistakes.
Whoever doesent work doesent make mistakes.
Whoever doesent make mistakes gets promoted.

alt Re: Jokes Anyone?

DontKnowToScript
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Three women walk and then a witch comes to them. the witch says "say something you think about yourself. if youre wrong, youll vanish."
the first says "i think im pretty." and dissappears.
the second says "i think im smart." and dissappeared.
the third,blonde girl says "I think...." and vanishes.

alt Re: Jokes Anyone?

KaliLinux
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In Soviet Russia:
* In Soviet Russia, baby aborts YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, car drives YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, monkey spanks YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, toilet flushes YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, road forks YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, fish catches YOU!
* In Soviet Russia, radio listens to YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, chair sits on YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, cold catches YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, cow tips YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, sentence finishes YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, bong hits YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, bucket kicks YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, TV watches YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, steak grills YOU!!!
* In Soviet Russia, CD burns YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, bar walks into YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, ass kicks YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, Waldo finds YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, n00b pwns j00!!!
* In Soviet Russia, bag punches YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, frog dissects YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, kitten huffs YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, mouse traps YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, remote controls YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, movie pirates YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, day seizes YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, picture hangs YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, bank robs YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, deer hunts YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, roulette turns YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, laundry hangs YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, toast burns YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, corn pops YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, nut cracks YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, weight gains YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, Pokemon catches YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, dust bites YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, rocket launches YOU!!
* In Soviet Russia, Tree chops YOU!!

alt Re: Jokes Anyone?

DontKnowToScript
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YellowBanana hat geschrieben
В Советской России, вы можете сосать мои яйца.

I suppose russian is forbidden,with any other language than english and german?
although that the soviet russia jokes were awesome,sasho.

alt Re: Jokes Anyone?

Vibhor
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Shouldn't the soviet russia jokes should be marked or atleast censored
There are alot of people finding that as an insult

alt Re: Jokes Anyone?

Lion_Hearted
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Blond was driving down the highway and all a sudden she starts swerving, first she swerves to the left, then to the right, and after almost crashing several dozen cars the police officer pushed her over to the side of the road.

Police officer: Mam? Your swerving everywhere? Whats wrong?

Blond: Well, it was very strange... I've driving along just fine and all a sudden this tree comes infront of me... so I swerve to miss it, then another one comes, so I swerve to miss that one...

Police officer: Mam... there isn't a tree alongside this highway for miles... what you saw was your air freshener swinging...

alt Re: Jokes Anyone?

Mawd
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keep adding a "lol" at the back of the "lol" word, and notice what the Urban Dictionary says.
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