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English Jokes Anyone?

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made in Finland
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Teacher Lupin: Harry I'm sorry to tell that I'll be leaving Hogwarts.
Harry: Are you fucking serious??
Teacher Lupin: How did you know about Sirius and I?

old Re: Jokes Anyone?

KimKart
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user Elfing has written
Man: Doctor When I do Thıs My Leg Hurts
Doctor:hmmm then dont do it
_______________
Apple:Mineral
Mineral:Power
Power:Job
Job:money
Money:Girl friend
Girl friend:Stress
Stress:cancer
Cancer:Death
Who wants an apple?


Has this got aneything to do with Apple and Steve Jobs?

old Re: Jokes Anyone?

oxytamine
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George, a party animal, spots a nice looking woman in a bar goes up and starts small talk. Seeing that she didn't back off he asked her name.
- Carmen, - she replied.
- That's a nice name, - he said warming up the conversation.
- Who named you, your mother?
- No, I named myself, - she answered.
- Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?
- Because I like cars, and I like men, - she said looking directly into his eyes. - And what is your name?
- Mr. Snortscrew.

old Re: Jokes Anyone?

hobo man445
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man goes to the doctor
man - doc, i dont feel so good
doc- have you been drinking latley?
man - oh yes, but it dosent help

old Re: Jokes Anyone?

palomino
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Looks like most of the jokes here

*puts on sunglasses*

are pretty cheesy.

YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!

old Re: Jokes Anyone?

Z-
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Have you heard of the retired streaker?
Spoiler >


got that from my playboy mag lol.

old Re: Jokes Anyone?

Black0ps
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I found these on a book!

There was an old woman resting on her house!
-THere was a fly flying onto the old woman's mouth!

-Oh no! There was a Fly flying onto the old woman's mouth?

-Yes! The Spider try to catch the Fly! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

-Oh no! The Spider try to catch the Fly! It goes to the mouth of the old woman?

- Yes! The bird try to catch the Spider! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

-Oh no! The bird try to catch the Spider! It goes to the mouth of the old woman?

-Yes! The Cat try to catch the Bird! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

-Oh no! The Cat try to catch the Bird! It goes to the mouth of the old woman?

-Yes! The Dog try to catch the Cat! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

- Oh no! The Dog try to catch the Cat! It goes to the mouth of the old woman?

-Yes! The Cow try to catch the Cat! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

-Oh no! The Cow try to catch the Cat! It goes to the mouth of the old woman?

- Yes! The Horse try to catch the Cow! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

-Oh no! The Horse try to catch the Cow! It goes to the mouth of the old woman? The old woman has no life!!

old Re: Jokes Anyone?

sixpack
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user KimKart has written
user Elfing has written
Man: Doctor When I do Thıs My Leg Hurts
Doctor:hmmm then dont do it
_______________
Apple:Mineral
Mineral:Power
Power:Job
Job:money
Money:Girl friend
Girl friend:Stress
Stress:cancer
Cancer:Death
Who wants an apple?


Has this got aneything to do with Apple and Steve Jobs?

No since it's not mineral.

old Re: Jokes Anyone?

Grimmrog
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user Black0ps has written
I found these on a book!

There was an old woman resting on her house!
-THere was a fly flying onto the old woman's mouth!

-Oh no! There was a Fly flying onto the old woman's mouth?

-Yes! The Spider try to catch the Fly! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

-Oh no! The Spider try to catch the Fly! It goes to the mouth of the old woman?

- Yes! The bird try to catch the Spider! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

-Oh no! The bird try to catch the Spider! It goes to the mouth of the old woman?

-Yes! The Cat try to catch the Bird! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

-Oh no! The Cat try to catch the Bird! It goes to the mouth of the old woman?

-Yes! The Dog try to catch the Cat! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

- Oh no! The Dog try to catch the Cat! It goes to the mouth of the old woman?

-Yes! The Cow try to catch the Cat! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

-Oh no! The Cow try to catch the Cat! It goes to the mouth of the old woman?

- Yes! The Horse try to catch the Cow! It goes to the mouth of the old woman!

-Oh no! The Horse try to catch the Cow! It goes to the mouth of the old woman? The old woman has no life!!


shouldn't the cow get to the Dog and not the Cat?

old Re: Jokes Anyone?

DannyDeth
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user if has written
U!@&*!^@*!(@
Curse u Factis, racism is not funny, just so happens i'm Chinese.

Why in china so many people have small penis and no sense of humor?
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